Sunday, September 1, 2013


Obligation overload is a very good description of how I feel lately.... its good to have a blog because sometimes you can just vent.... and this is one of those times.... Around this time every year as I'm sure all of you can attest to... allergies run rampant and reek havoc to your senses and sensibilities.. you feel itchy, achey, tired, worn out... well I am no different... and this weekend they came and tried to push me right to the ground... well I have tried to persevere... so on this I have a hubsband who came home for 3 days... a 16 year old's birthday, and a family party... (the laundry, house, dogs, cleaning, cooking... forget that for a minute) so something's gotta give.. .so I sacrificed the family party... 1. its in Plainfield.... Every time I go to Plainfield I either get into an accident or get a ticket because it consists of two main roads and I can't drive either one of them.. so every time someone says Plainfield  I have like a visceral reaction.... 2. Its going to be like all day... My hubsband and I are trying to reconnect ( see previous posts of anger, resentment and the like) and I want to spend as much one on one time with him as possible...3.  Jack's not going to go and hubsband and son need to spend time together as well.... add allergies and I'm out.... so my family all send me texts that are borderline nasty about me not going... My hubsband says the only one who can make me feel bad about not going is me... I honestly feel obligation overload.. especially around my extended family... and invitation is more like a demand than an invitation... every holiday is a mandatory get together and theres alot of people so if its at your house.. better head out to Costco cuz its gonna be a feast.. So I have to let go of the guilt over my extended family... am I the best sister, daughter, aunt? NO!!! but you know.. theres no award for that... I have to live on my terms.. not what people expect of me... swoosh thats easier said than done!!!

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